Nomi and Keith's Wedding

Yet again there shall be heard... in the cities of Judah, and in the streets of Jerusalem​.

The voice of joy and the voice of gladness,​ the voice of the bridegroom​m and the voice of the bride.

Jerem​iah 33:10-11

Jo and I traveled to Baltimore several weeks before the wedding to meet Keith’s mom and attend to details at the Pearlstone Center where the wedding will be held.  Nomi sent invitations to friends to join us for Shabbat dinner at her home and fifteen attended, some with young children in tow.  Nomi and Keith had set a long narrow table in their living room/dining room with place settings many of which bore a striking resemblance to the stoneware pattern Jo and I had chosen in our wedding registry.  Those 35-year-old dishes have never seemed so beautiful.  The women gathered in the living room around the Shabbat candles, each lighting two for their own families and, in unison, they waved their hands, covered their eyes and recited the blessing. Arm-in-arm, we sang Shalom Alechem and I was given the honor of saying Kiddush.  They honored Shabbat traditions and have created their own; as Nomi said the blessing over the Challah, each individual touched each other to share in the mitzvah.

Thirty-five years ago, Jo and my wedding was a traditional affair – formal evening dress, color coordinated bridesmaids, a choice of chicken or fish.  Nomi and Keith’s wedding, was nothing of the sorts: they stood outside, under the chupah, surrounded by the lake and fields and the vegetable garden.   Music was provided by “Charm City Klezmer” followed by “Jackass Flats” a bluegrass band.  The dress code is cited as “farm chic” and jeans and overalls were as popular as sport jackets and dresses. 

But the wedding was also steeped in our Jewish traditions: We gathered with family and friends for a beautiful Shabbat dinner, Shabbat morning davening and, as the sun set over the farm, gathered for Havdolah. Accompanied by small groups of friends, Nomi and Keith, rose early in the morning to dip in the mitkvah.  Following the tisch, and led by guitars and mandolins, the men joyously dance and accompanied Keith as he walked to Nomi for the Bedekin.  Friends presented them with a beautiful hand-written and designed Ketubah.  

Nomi and Keith’s wedding was so wonderfully emblematic of the Jewish lives they are building together; ancient customs fused with new traditions; Judaism that is grounded in tradition but brought to life and framed
by who they are and the values they hold dear. Judaism is infused into who they are and who they aspire to be.

Nomi talks about “intentional communities” and organizes conferences at the Pearlstone Center to advance the state of the art.  As a Hillel Director, I contemplate what this means for my campus and my community.  How does one build an “intentional Jewish community”; one infused with the values and spirit of our Jewish heritage, legacy and culture? How do we frame and articulate a compelling encompassing mission and vision?  How do we model and advance Jewish values and Jewish consciousness in each moment in our encounters with students and members of our campus communities?  Perhaps of greatest importance is how we help our students find and embrace a deep and meaningful Judaism that infuses their lives with meaning.

Rabbi Ben Zoma taught: “Who is the rich person; the one who is happy with his portion” (Talmud—Avot 4:1).  Still aglow with the great joy Nomi and Keith’s wedding, I turn on my computer and begin another day of work at Hillel. I am so grateful for the wealth that God has given me.