Yet again there shall
be heard... in the cities of Judah, and in the streets of Jerusalem.
The voice of joy and
the voice of gladness, the voice of the bridegroomm and the voice of the
bride.
Jeremiah 33:10-11
Jo and I traveled to Baltimore
several weeks before the wedding to meet Keith’s mom and attend to details at
the Pearlstone Center where the wedding will be held. Nomi sent invitations to friends to join us
for Shabbat dinner at her home and fifteen attended, some with young children
in tow. Nomi and Keith had set a long
narrow table in their living room/dining room with place settings many of which
bore a striking resemblance to the stoneware pattern Jo and I had chosen in our
wedding registry. Those 35-year-old
dishes have never seemed so beautiful.
The women gathered in the living room around the Shabbat candles, each
lighting two for their own families and, in unison, they waved their hands,
covered their eyes and recited the blessing. Arm-in-arm, we sang Shalom Alechem
and I was given the honor of saying Kiddush.
They honored Shabbat traditions and have created their own; as Nomi said
the blessing over the Challah, each individual touched each other to share in
the mitzvah.
Thirty-five years ago, Jo and my
wedding was a traditional affair – formal evening dress, color coordinated
bridesmaids, a choice of chicken or fish.
Nomi and Keith’s wedding, was nothing of the sorts: they stood outside, under
the chupah, surrounded by the lake and fields and the vegetable garden. Music was provided by “Charm City Klezmer” followed
by “Jackass Flats” a bluegrass band. The
dress code is cited as “farm chic” and jeans and overalls were as popular as
sport jackets and dresses.
But the wedding was also steeped
in our Jewish traditions: We gathered with family and friends for a beautiful
Shabbat dinner, Shabbat morning davening and, as the sun set over the farm,
gathered for Havdolah. Accompanied by small groups of friends, Nomi and Keith, rose
early in the morning to dip in the mitkvah.
Following the tisch, and led by guitars and mandolins, the men joyously
dance and accompanied Keith as he walked to Nomi for the Bedekin. Friends presented them with a beautiful hand-written
and designed Ketubah.
Nomi and Keith’s wedding was so
wonderfully emblematic of the Jewish lives they are building together; ancient
customs fused with new traditions; Judaism that is grounded in tradition but
brought to life and framed by who they are and the values they hold dear. Judaism is infused into who they are and who they aspire to be.
Nomi talks about “intentional
communities” and organizes conferences at the Pearlstone Center to advance the
state of the art. As a Hillel Director,
I contemplate what this means for my campus and my community. How does one build an “intentional Jewish community”;
one infused with the values and spirit of our Jewish heritage, legacy and
culture? How do we frame and articulate a compelling encompassing mission and
vision? How do we model and advance
Jewish values and Jewish consciousness in each moment in our encounters with
students and members of our campus communities?
Perhaps of greatest importance is how we help our students find and
embrace a deep and meaningful Judaism that infuses their lives with meaning.
Rabbi Ben Zoma taught: “Who is
the rich person; the one who is happy with his portion” (Talmud—Avot 4:1).
Still aglow with the great joy Nomi and
Keith’s wedding, I turn on my computer and begin another day of work at Hillel.
I am so grateful for the wealth that God has given me.
